Sitting by a Window

Everything is put in it's rightful place and organized. The schedule is not complete but will soon figure a way to make all the wants and needs to fit in a timely and orderly fashion. And the best of all, is that I'm here.
Roughly 2 weeks ago, I began the arduous task of packing up my belongings, once more, and carefully packing up my car (and what later over loaded into my dad's dodge pickup truck). My friend drove down from Idaho to meet up with me and together we would caravan down "the 5" through California to Los Angeles. There we would unpack both of our cars, carry all the belongings up a flight of stairs, and sometimes having to juggle with the stairs, front gates that can not be propted open, and must be unlocked by a magnetic key (for safety reasons of course), and finally collapse on the floor in shock and awe that we made it.
Those next two nights while I awaited patiently and gratefully for my parents to come down with the rest of my "shtuff", were a little longer then I anticipated. As I laid on the air mattress, and listened to the strange noises outside in the big city that I still not familiar with, I wondered how in the heck this was all going to work out. "Was I crazy?"
But to my relief, my mother and father knew exactly what to say and do that would make what was an empty apartment, feel like my own "home" and remind me that this is my time to dedicate to me so that I can later serve others. The furnature was put together and placed in the room, the walls were decorated slightly, and the cubboards filled with with food, books, movies, or clothes and other annonymous items. As they left, and it was just my friend and I heading back to our seperate apartments, my heart was lifted, knowing that my family loved me immensely. That no matter where I could have moved to, they would have done all they could to try and be there for me and help me get established.
So, now, here I sit, after cleaning for the first time, and taking inventory on everything, and having completed my first day as a graduate student, I'm still filled with that same feeling. Even though the sounds of an ice cream truck going down the street, dogs barking, the loud black lady that randomly talks to strangers and the zooming cars that wizz by, I can still feel at home in my apartment. Just me, myself and I; sit and be grateful for everything that i have and continue to wonder how can my life be more blessed then it already has? And what can I do so that I can try and repay just an ounce of what I have been given?

Finding Sunshine amidst the Fog

You know the scene from "The Sound of Music" where Maria is first leaving the abbey to go to the Von Trapp's for the first time, and she is talking about "Whenever the Lord closes a door, somewhere he opens a window...What will this day be like? I wonder. What will my future be? I wonder. It could be so exciting, to be out in the world to be free, my heart should be wildly rejoicing...oh what's the matter with me?"
This is the perfect definition and description of myself at this time in life. With the count down in the single digits to when I move, I should be more and more excited. I have a small understanding and glimpse of what life will be like, but still, I am not entirely sure of myself.
The summer felt like it would never come a few months ago, and now, I feel like there should still be so much time left. Time...our best friend and worst enemy. It is what we make it out to be. In the older Mormon adds on TV they would say, "Isn't it about time?", and all the cliche phrases, "The early bird gets the worm", or "a penny saved, is a penny earned". They all lead to the same thing. What have you been doing with your life? Are you spending it working and trying to get ahead; wistfully trying to daydream your hopes and dreams to reality, playing with your family, squandering, or always trying too hard to make "every little exact thing happen at this precise moment"???? Think about it. I heard on the radio today, that those who took a moment "to smell the roses"; go on a walk with friends, garden, etc live longer then maybe some of those who run marathons (or other activities) that "increase your health".
Life is for the giving and taking. If you are always trying to give to it, eventually you'll find that you've saved nothing for yourself and want something to hold onto in the end. But if you never give back, then you'll have no one to hold onto because they don't have anything else to give you.
I am certain of one thing, and that is that nothing is for certain. The future is a little hazy and foggy, and I am not entirely sure what is on the horizon, but I do know that I am armed with the most essential things in life; family, friends, love and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.